The Red Flag and the Bull(headed)

Posted: May 24, 2011 in For brothers, Living in Corinth, Relationship thoughts

It so happened that I met a lady some time ago on ChristianCafe; and in the course of the getting-to-know you dialogue she was reading my profile. She did not think very highly of this posting and wanted to dispute it with me, so she did; but not by any straightforward measure. E-mail, to start with, is not the best way to communicate; all kinds of contextual clues like facial gestures get stripped out, and people often write very differently than they speak. Those are givens. She was, however, pretty sure it was a RED FLAG!! in her words that I declined to discuss it further unless in person. Apparently she had found evidence that I was lacking in integrity in my unwillingness to discuss the matter unless in person.

The real red flag was her combativeness; but it was a red flag for me; she was comfortable with making an accusation against my integrity not for something I wrote, but because of the way I handled the dialog. She was in error.

Why this posting? Not to kvetch about her. I’m glad she revealed herself. My point for the Christian brother: Women will show “red flag” behavior as well. It seems pointless that this even should have to be voiced, right? But I think it needs to be, especially for the believing single man in a fellowship that does not admit that women have an old nature as well, and a need to mature; just as a man does.

This is not a bad idea to think on; neither shameful nor evil. They both ate, and you have corrupting influence of original sin in your own human nature, as well. I’m just advising you not to pedestalize women, even Christian ones.

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Comments
  1. sing says:

    the same could be said for a man who agrees too readily with a woman too..i think the advice cuts both ways…to look with both eyes open what you are getting yourself into, when you enter into a relationship with a man (for a woman) and with a woman (for a man)…i had similar experience but of a different kind and in the end, hurt was all mine…

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